Among us: Who is the Real Imposter

Have you tried this new game yet? Ok, so maybe not “Gen Z new”, but pandemic new. “Among us” is a cute little game where you and your friends are adorable hat-adorned minions stuck on a space-ship together, but one of you is secretly an imposter out to sabotage the ship and crew. It’s fun, but the title made me reflect on how I usually hear the term “imposter”, and it’s not typically in a “I’m-a-cute-minion-with-a-fun-hat” kind of way. It’s usually the sensation of being out-of-place in my work environment, you know what I’m talking about: Imposter Syndrome.

I recently watched a video by Mike Mena, a linguist from New York, who breaks down the history and meaning behind the term imposter syndrome - and its racist connotations when applied to people of colour. Mena makes a compelling argument that imposter syndrome (which was once called imposter phenomenon) internalizes the problem to us. He suggests that what’s actually happening when we describe imposter syndrome is in fact imposter training. A process wherein we, people of colour, experience a multitude of ~moments~ : doubts, barriers to persistence, and lack of belonging, which leads us to believe we are imposing. These “moments'' range in extremity, both in the scale of their impact and the time and energy it takes to heal/ignore/address them. From the microaggressions that slowly erode our confidence to the large-scale barriers or behaviors that steal our time and energy to respond to, ultimately we are the imposters.

Syndrome is defined as a set of symptoms that consistently occur together, with no definitive root cause, whereas a phenomenon is an observable fact or event. My concern is that if we defer to calling “these symptoms” imposter phenomenon or imposter syndrome, it completely absolves responsibility from the structures and systems that intentionally stagnate culture shift and true belonging.  A comet is a fucking phenomenon, imposter “culture” is contrived and upheld to benefit patriarchy and white supremacy culture, the true underlying disease. Calling it imposter syndrome is a lazy and distracting diagnosis that can be quite literally dangerous for people of colour - either by threatening their immediate safety if cops/”security” are involved (especially for black and indigeneous folks) and/or from the long-term physiological and psychological stress to our bodies and minds.

 While Mena suggests using the term imposter syndrome is racist, I can’t help but think of the intersections at which imposter culture affects any person who strays from a “status quo” identity, whether that be neurodivergence, race, gender, sexuality, ability, etc. As women of colour working in spaces that weren’t designed for us, it’s no surprise to feel the multiplied effects of intersectional identities. But I know sooo many people (yes, even some white, cis, men) that also feel trapped by the shackles of imposter syndrome. Surely it can’t be everyone experiencing the same symptoms??  It seems to me like “multiple unrelated incidents'' is cop-out reporting that distracts from the deeper cultural pandemic.

But “culture” is hard to pinpoint, it’s so much bigger than the superficial depictions that are out-wardly expressed (like dance, language, social conventions) because it is supported by deep roots of shared beliefs and assumptions, and upheld through policy. So, is a rose by any other name still just a red flower? Whatever we end up calling it, whether its treating the symptoms of a syndrome, understanding the facts of a phenomenon, or changing the tea-bag of a well-steeped culture, how do we actually address the root cause of imposter culture instead of herding oppressed folk to “imposter syndrome webinars”? Culture shift involves multiple stages, in short requiring three bottom-up practices to be sustainable: 1) naming the current culture, 2) re-framing to align with new values, and 3) reinforcing new norms through example and practice. Crucially, a shift in institutional policy must back up any culture shift. This would look like genuine and intentional effort at multiple institutional levels to invest in anti-bias training, critique hiring practices, and examine patterns of training and retention (or lack thereof) etc., to name a few.

First of all, I’m going to take a leaf out of the linguist playbook and start calling it what it is: Imposter Culture. My own thinking needs to shift to remind myself that I am not the problem. This doesn’t mean that I can’t be problematic or that I’m going to lose all sense of humility, we’re all bound to mess up, learn, move on, and try to do better. The point is that me being in this space isn’t the problem. My experiences are symptoms of a disease that is so much bigger than my “insecurities”, no longer will I assume that feeling othered means there's something inherently wrong with me.

Next, I’m going to keep showing up in spaces where I don’t have to justify my existence and experiences, where the people just “get It”. Because if everyone there is “an imposter” then none of us really are.  And then? I’m going to keep showing up in spaces where I do have to justify my existence, until I no longer need to, and until nobody else has to. We have to keep asking ourselves who isn’t here? How do I help them get here? Then what? This is the phase of re-framing and identifying core values. We’ve known for a while now that workplaces often don’t retain diverse peoples, doing the re-imaging work of what we want and what could be is so important to envision where we want to go.

I’ve been cautioned by older and sometimes wiser people that “change takes time”. And yes, I get it, culture change means changing the entire tea pot’s water. And when you want a cup of tea right now, staring at the kettle doesn’t help it boil any faster. But if there’s anything that the events of the past year have taught me, it is that social momentum and movements can spread as quickly and broadly as any virus, and now is our opportunity to heal both. This is the “final'' and on-going phase of reinforcing new behaviours, language, and norms that tips the scales of culture shift, and it is the shared responsibility of everyone to normalize inclusion. Both by setting an example from the bottom-up, and by applying pressure on leadership to adopt policy that encourages retention of diversity. The dynamic and responsive nature of culture change is well described by the wise Maya Angelou, “Do the best you can until you know better. Then when you know better, do better”.

So, what the hell? If I’m a minion on a spaceship and I’m not sure I belong, I’m gonna keep running around with my unique, wonderful, flamingo-hat-clad minion pals and rock the boat ‘til we all belong. If that’s what makes me an “imposter”, then friend, I’m here to impose.