We Won’t Be Defeated: The Resilience of A WOC Space, LLC
Mondays have always been hit or miss for me. Either it’s a good one or bad one and its usually dependent on how my weekend went. This Monday in particular, March 31, 2020 to be exact, started as a pretty good one. I woke up early to be on time for a 9 am work meeting, joined my mid-morning co-working space with other women of color (WOC), and edited a manuscript while sharing my screen with 5 brown female faces, an experience unfamiliar from my usual work environment. I enjoyed a not-so-healthy lunch (come on its COVID-19), attended my weekly less ethnically diverse Zoom meetings, and rushed to end the day excited to start my virtual Women’s Circle hosted by A WOC Space, LLC.
I started the Zoom meeting just as I had done for the past 2 weeks and wasn’t there long before I heard a female voice talking to me. “HI!” Not recognizing the voice, but excited to meet a new attendee, I switched screens to greet her, “What’s up?! Welcome to Women’s Circle!”, “Yeah, I saw this on Twitter, but you should be careful cuz you can get hacked…” My confusion was met by disbelief as nearly 100 terrorists flooded my screen yelling,
“NIGGER, NIGGER, NIGGER!!!”
Wait, what?!! I closed the meeting, “did I pour my drink too strong?” I restarted the meeting.
They were already there this time. Waiting. For me. Like predators. Yelling,
“NIGGER, NIGGER, NIGGER, why did she close the meeting, NIGGER, NIGGER, NIGGER!!!”
I closed the meeting. I password protected the link. I restarted the meeting. They were gone.
I was alone in my apartment. Social distancing.
Cut off from the community I had created to avoid the feeling that was slowly growing in my soul now. I couldn’t restart the meeting, no one had the password. I couldn’t call anyone; I was in shock. I was in shock until the tears started, until my face was flooded, and my body shook in fear. I finally texted friends and they called and calmed me down. I tried to sleep and was doing good too!
Until the voices started, little white whispers, “nigggggerrrrr” I jolted from my sleep, I cried again. I cancelled our virtual WOCSpace events the next day for safety reasons and it broke my heart. The safe space I had dreamed of creating had been taken away from me, now what?
I submitted a Zoom report causing me to relive the event, but this time the sadness and fear turned to anger and outrage. I promised the women that had joined our virtual meetings a safe space for them to exist, hell, I promised that to MYSELF, and there was NO way some Zoombombers were going to take that away from US!
Feeling empowered and resilient I did a few interviews about the attack (Buzzfeed News, Mother Jones), started an email listserv to distribute the password to our members, spoke to a therapist about the trauma, and fully committed to continue our virtual meetings. We are now stronger than ever and realize this space is vital for the preservation and empowerment of women of color. With that in mind, and in order to promote solidarity as we reclaim our virtual WOCSpace:
We ask that 100 WOC and allies join our Women’s Circle on May 11, 2020 at 5 pm PST wearing YELLOW to replace the 100 Zoombombers that attacked our meeting and demonstrate that we cannot and will not be defeated!
*To ensure a safe space for everyone, please email awocspace@gmail.com to RSVP*