Yes, I do have a father
I have always enjoyed the water, and my passion brought me to Bali Indonesia the summer between my junior and senior year at Hampton University. During this time, unwillingly I learned a valuable lesson; even half way across the globe, I will be a black woman above all. Another researcher, a full fledge professor at that, whom before this I had minimal personal contact with walked over to a table where myself and about 7 other students were eating dinner. She asked,
“Do you have a father?”
I guess at another table, professors were discussing my upbringing and family ties. Instead of asking me about my family, this professor decided to lean in on stereotypes that perpetuate Blacks and assumed that I was a clone of my mother. Instantly I felt slighted and wondered why this woman would think I didn’t have a father. Did we even have the type of technology that could clone a human being? Not only do I know my dad, but we have a strong relationship. Everyone has a father, whether we know them or not is a different story and inappropriate for someone to ask. After she was informed by her peers of how inconsiderate her comment was, she gave a backwards apology, citing the fact that most black fathers are absent as her crutch. This to me wasn’t an apology, but her trying to get me to see her point of view.
I wish I could say this was the last time that stereotypes were used to make untrue assumptions of my life, but it was not. I thought obtaining a PhD and working at a top university would aid the world in seeing me not just as a Black woman, but I was wrong. Now let’s be clear, I love being a black woman and this is a strong part of my identity. All of the negative connotations associated with Black women make it difficult for the world to truly get to know me, Camille. Rarely are high ranking positions awarded to WOC in STEM fields in academia, even at minority-serving institutions. While the student body is majority Black, the same is less likely for the faculty of STEM departments. The cards are stacked against Black Americans to obtain the credentials needed to get these positions. Many are deterred by racial and gender prejudices before their academic and professional finish lines. I know this all too well. As a postdoc there are a number of times I have questioned my path, not because of the work, but the social dynamics. We know that people are more productive when they feel comfortable and accepted. This stands true for all people.
It is degrading when someone comes over and ask if I have a father. This makes me uncomfortable and it hurts my feelings. In the workspace at that, I am not awarded the curtesy of being human. It alarms me when I talk to my Black peers or mentors and too often they have similar stories where their lives were reduced down to one stereotype. It saddens me, but also motivates me. The need of A WOCSpace is real. When I was asked to be apart of the A WOCSpace team, my soul said yes. Too often do you see minorities brought into the workforce without the proper tools and practices to foster inclusion and growth. I share the vision of A WOCSpace, to change the workplace culture, where communication barriers are broken down and stereotypes are known but never placed on people.